RiverMales: All Tea, All Shade, All Riverdale
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RiverMales: All Tea, All Shade, All Riverdale
Matt Marr (@themattmarr) and Jake Anthony (@jakeitorfakeit) are two Southern Queens who adore watching some campy television. They also love any show with real hot guys. We didn't say this was a deep show, y'all. Join the "Sisters" from different misters, as they recap CW's RIVERDALE (with HOT ARCH...
Neueste Episoden
100 Episoden
RiverMales 101: Riverdale Season 4 Premieres!
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Rivermales 100: Riverdale Season 4 Preview!
Y'all. Don't Worry. We're going to recap the Season 4 premiere we are just a week behind. So we thought we would at least let you know we haven't jing...

Rivermales 99: The Riverdale FINALE and our 100th Episode! And We're drunk y'all.
Okay--we messed up. It's not really our 100 episode, but let's just pretend it is and that Jake and Mattie didn't realize this one-year later....mkay?...

RiverMales 98: How you gonna keep them down on the farm, after they’ve seen…Your organ harvesting operation?”
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RiverMales 97: It's Prom and Chad Michael Murray is Shirtless & Hot AF
We were speechless. Chad Michael Murray at 37 y'all...Who Knew! #BasementFlooded
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RiverMales 96: Fear The Reaper...Uhhh Don't Worry We Won't!
Oh Riverdale...Oh Riverdale, how downhill you've gone. And this was Luke Perry's last episode.
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Rivermales 95: Finally! A Betty and Alice Episode!
Y'all. We were so happy our two favorite ladies got to have some great scenes and that Betty is getting closer to the coo coo ness of the Farm!
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Rivermales 94: Archie and Mad Dog Box And The Secret Scenes Abound
Whew. Y'all. We had to have a big glass of iced tea over this episode. Archie's hair is on point. Mad Dag is just well...exquisite. And Chad Michael...

RiverMales 93: Heathers, the Musical Episode... and we are Queens With Opinions
Who knew that Fangs could sing!!!!! We thought he was just a pair of arms! Also some exciting news about our upcoming 100 episode!
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RiverMales 92: Keeping Up with The Joneses...and Hot Girl Sex
The episode is still kinda all over the place but if you're into really graphic lesbian sex on cable tv, then you're watching the right show.
L...

RiverMales 91: Betty Burns, Gina Sings, & Veronica Need to Just run a Gay Bar at this Point
I mean...our title says it all this week. We are really saddened by the passing of Luke Perry--but it doesn't mean the show is any better. Also Poodl...

RiverMales 90: Archie Gets In the Ring While the Show Gets Lost
Archie is the new Rocky y'all...and Sherriff Keller is serving Burgess Meredith realness!
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RiverMales 89: Riverdale Finds It's Rainbow...FINALLY!
Finally Finally Finally we get some MooKev moments, with that bittersweet ending! Also, Poodle goes into a very specific and graphic fantasy night wit...

RiverMales 88: Hermione Shows Her Hand, Jughead & Betty are on the case, and Archie is still emo and annoying
This episode was actually good! I mean we were shocked. It's been such a dry run this season but we loved the noir theme and we loved Josi singing Ste...

RiverMales 87: There's a New Villain in Riverdale...the SATS!
Archie comes back to town and this crap show gets so much better. Don't worry--there were some coo coo ma goo moments, but we liked this so much more....

RiverMales 86: Serpents and Archie and Bears...OH MY!
... ... ... A bear y'all. A bear. This show is why we drink but it's all for your laughter and enjoyment!
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RiverMales 85: Don't Mess With Jughead's Momma--Gina Gershon For the Win!
Mattie liked a lot of this episode and Poodle did not. So get ready for some debate. But the one thing these queens agreed on--Gina Gershon! Jughead's...

Rivermales 84: Riverdale Deep Dive and Conspiracy Theories with the Gals from Swimming in Sweetwater Part 2
Mari and Caitlin are basically Riverdale savants. They are the hosts of Swimming in Sweetwater: A Deep Dive Into Riverdale. We have become such fans...

Rivermales 83: Hay, Hay, Heeeyyy Archie's Shirtless and Dumb
Archie is so dumb...yet still so hot. This was the experimental episode--but it kinda of missed the mark. Shocking.
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RiverMales 82: ManHunter and the Sex Bunker
Woooo-wee. This episode was bad y'all!!! I mean rough. Thank Jesus, you got us to carry you through. Poodle has very strong opinions and Mattie has...

RiverMales 81: The Great Escape-Archie is bound and We are gagging!
Y'all. This episode was a trip to crazy town and at least there was a gay kiss...well kinda.
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RiverMales 80: The Midnight Club AKA the Flasback Episode!!
We. Had. Opinions. On this episode. We really liked some parts and well...there was some shade but still. Lili Reinhardt truly does no wrong, y'all.

RiverMales 79: Archie Joins Shawshank Fight Club
This was NOT our favorite episode...but goodness if they keep putting shirtless guys in the show--who cares!
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Rivermales 78: Riverdale 0302 Archie goes to a Porn Prison
We barely breathed this episode. There was so much shirtless Archie that we really didn't know what to do with ourselves, ya'll!
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Rivermales 77: Riverdale 0301 Season 3 Opener Leaves Us Hot...and a bit bothered
THIS SEASON ONE OPENER WAS EVERYTHING WE WANTED!!!!!!!!!! But like a sexy hookup who ends up being a bad cuddler...the end of this episode left us sc...

TVTT 76: Lili Reinhardt talks about playing young Alice Cooper and Jakes Riverdale scandal theory!
Only two weeks y'all until Riverdale. Good thing we are scraping the barrel for news! Luckily we have Gay-D-D so we carry on. KEEP GOING QUEENS!
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TvTT 75: Two Riverdale cast Members are Dating IRL & Reaction to the new Mary Poppins Trailer
Ohhhhhhhh, Veronica is cheating on Archie (okay not really) but in real life she is...but with who!
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TvTT 74: Sabrina Teaser Reaction and Riverdale Casting News
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TvTT 73: We Know What You Did This Summer: Riverdale Cast
Basically we are discussing the thirst trap that is Charles Melton and KJ Apa's Instagram. It's so good y'all. #werethirty
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TvTT 72: Riverdale Season 3 Promo Recap!!
Okay season 2 was rough but from the looks of this promo, Season 3 is going to be lit!!! And we will probably be lit too!
So much to break do...

TvTT 71: Trying Cheap Rosé and WHO'S our Favorite Reality Star?
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TvTT 70: Two Men Squealing over Painful Face Masks
We really don't know why we decided to try this. It was painful, traumatic...and we are sure you will enjoy it.
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TvTT 69: A Lookback on What 80's Cartoons made us Gay...Also Reggie from Riverdale is a TEASE!
Well Riverdale is on a break...but not these queens! Like y'all say, we KEEP GOING QUEENS! Enjoy. Also you can watch this episode on Youtube as well...

TvTT 68: Jake and Mattie get drunk watching Riverdale Finale Ch. 35-Brave New World
Y'all. This Riverdale finale on the CW was disappointing, but Mattie and Jake got real drunk. So who knows what these queens are going to say...
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TvTT 67: Riverdale Ch. 34 Judgment Night
Y'all...what could have happened in this episode...happened! Where do we even start? Hint...a gay joke, of course!
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TvTT 66: Riverdale Ch. 33 "Shadow of a Doubt"...there was a plot
Ugh...y'all...just ugh.
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TvTT 65: Riverdale Chapter 32: Prisoners
The shade is REAL for this week's episode, y'all. Sorry...we hated it!
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TvTT 64: Riverdale Ch. 31 CARRIE The Musical!
This episode was maybe the best episode of the season. We loved. And y'all know we are picky about our musicals.
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TvTT 63: EXLUSIVE Interview with Moose aka Cody Kearsley from RIVERDALE
We were LITERALLY clutching our pearls in delight talking to Riverdale's own, Moose! Actor Cody Kearsley lets us truthtalk him and get the tea on how...

TvTT 62: Riverdale Ch. 30 The Noose Tightens
We have no idea what this show is doing? For the love of God, someone get this show back on track!
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